The Hidden "Me"

Free to Be Me

Well, it certainly has been awhile. At least one whole semester has come and gone since I last posted here. I am still however, relentless in my goal of completing my undergraduate degree. In fact I have one semester left before graduation.

Since last I posted here, I have lost a considerable amount of weight. I now wear a size 8 - down from the size 18 I wore 18 months ago. You might be thinking that the stress of taking 18+ credits a semester has finally taken its toll. To the contrary, my weight loss is due to completely changing my eating habits. I now limit my intake of sugar and processed foods. On the rare occasions when I do use sugar, I use raw or turbinado sugar.

I can hear what you're thinking - I have lost my mind and I am depriving myself. I can tell you however, that I do not feel deprived and I actually do not miss any of the sugary treats. I have replaced them with 100% whole grains, fruits and nuts. I am never hungry unless I am late eating a meal. Most of all though, I FEEL GREAT!

Now before someone out there succumbs to condemnation, my testimonial is not intended to point fingers, I realize that my new eating lifestyle is not for everyone. Therefore I am not advocating or trying to impose my new way of eating on others - and this brings me to another point. Just this afternoon, a friend posted on facebook, "My name is TRIUMPH! What's yours and a short description of why?" I gave it a thought, examined some of the other posts which listed,"Determined," "Victorious," etc., then I realized, and posted the following:

My name is "Me"... happy with who I am. I was given all the strength and ability I will ever need at birth. Everyday may not be great, but everyday I am happy with "Me." There is nothing I need to change - the good, bad or ugly, it is all a part of who I am. I just need to learn to better manage all the things that make me "Me."

The foregoing sums up my philosophy. In this journey I have become very comfortable with who I am. The weight loss is not the result of trying to make myself look like someone else. It has come as a result of living life on my own terms and accepting me for who I am - a book loving, wife, mother, grandmother, who does not always please people, nor live up to their expectations, but those who know me best, love me just the way I am.

Peace

The Year in Brief

The past year has been great, albeit hard work. I have had moments when I thought that I wasn't going to make my goal of getting all 'A's. As ridiculous as it seems to some, I want to graduate 'summa cum laude' in the Spring of 2011. That is my goal and I won't give up.

Summer school begins on Monday and I have had a good week's break. I'm ready!

Big Chill (as in Chillin)

Woohoo! Finals are finished and now it is time more some mind-numbing television, sleep and overall chillin (not necessaritly in that order). It has been a hard but good semester.

Wonk, Wonk...

As I listen I know I've heard that voice before, "Wonk, wonk... wonk wonk." Then it dawns on me with a sudden clarity, unlike the biology lecture I am enduring -- it's the voice of Charlie Brown's teacher. Doesn't this professor have any other gears? Her voice seems to be stuck in 2nd and at 8 a.m., less than a week post the time change 'Spring Forward', her lecture is too much. Thus, with the drone in my ears, I take an hour and a quarter nap. Hopefully I get the information via osmosis.

Just TMI!

OK, it's time to vent. My latest rant is about "cracks and backs". Yes, I'm talking about those hinder parts of people's anatomy that should remain private. I'm tired of walking around campus behind men who wear their pants completely under their behinds, revealing dingy underwear or worse, as they waddle like penguins down the sidewalk. Further, women are not exempt from my criticism. Women with ample "junk in the trunk" need not wear low-rise jeans that reveal deep flesh valleys. Don't they feel the breeze? It's the most disgusting thing in the world to be in class and have one of these individuals sit in front of you. Enough already people... TOO MUCH INFORMATION!

I'm Still Here...

Wow it has been 'a minute' since I made an entry here. To say my life is extreme is quite a bit of an understatement. Just when most of my peers are stepping toward the door of retirement, I have embarked (again) on one of the greatest challenges of my life.

The last few months have been crazy busy and I have wondered if I am going to be able to keep this pace up. However when that feeling comes over me I realize that I can't give up. Yesterday at work when I filled out my time-sheet for the last month, I realized that I unintentionally worked 2 hours short of full-time (avg. 40 hrs per week). I don't know how I managed, along with carrying 16 credit hours of course work. Something is going to have to give, but this time around it can't be school.

They say, "The definition of insanity is to do something the way you always have and expect different results." This is apropos to me; usually in the past when I have tried to work and go to school I have cut back on school in favor of work (always need the money)and end up being stuck in a dead-end job. Not this time... the insanity has stopped; I have to fulfill my dream. I have to scale back on work, even though I need the money and concentrate on school. I can't let my GPA suffer, I am applying to several PhD programs for Fall 2011. My goal is to forgo a masters program and enter directly into a doctoral program. Very competitive, but doable. I HAVE A PLAN!

I promise some lighter stuff will follow next post. Stay tuned...